The last

procedure where you stuck a tube down my nose to the throat and I was conscious and given very little numbing aid you left me traumatized that was bull shit and we ain't doin bull shit no more

Right about now

I believe I have a piece of that needle in my body. my body has responded by vomiting,issues with digesting food,terrorizing night sweats,and the pain in the right eye every other day that feels like I'm being polked in the eye with the very same needle

Family

I don't have

Honest

definition- free from fraud or deception

My heart is in Texas

inspite of everything going on in my life

Now I know I have a way

of expressing myself but it does not compare to the way Mother would put a string of cuss words together not for the faint of heart or virgin ears I have never heard it like that since it was cock sucking mutha fucking crooked rotten dirty sonofabitches (referring to outside entities) my ears would burn I thought it was all one bad long cuss word ewe wee

The environment in which

I grew up in was not healthy to say the least it's a reason I felt like Cinderella

Um suppose tell you that

my "mother" has a history of mental illness bitches she is not my real mother and poisoned me to try and make me crazy to keep the lie going what the fuck I'll be the talking fetus

Because now when when

you ask me my family history

Mother wasn't a hugger

our first hug I remember I was a grown adult it got easier after that I never pretty much knew a normal Marjorie outside of her "mental illness" every six months she would be committed to kent oaks and every year Kalamazoo state hospital

Mother used to say

when my baby referring to myself gets grown that I would tell the story. I didn't know what that meant of course but agreed with her to soothe her because of her "mental illness " and here we are